I find myself looking for

god with no faith

no beliefs

other than the need for reprieve.

Conversations with myself often turn to

pleas for those I can’t reach

it’s hard for us who crave

control when none exist.

There’s none and never was

so build a god I must

and pray this time he does come through

for patience is not my gift

I need to see him receive

the happiness he so deserves

and I failed to secure.

Patience is not my gift but I’ll wait

for god to grace him first

a bone for me, then

if time allows.

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